A different Father’s Day message

On Father's Day, June 20, Mitch Albom wrote a very compelling column in the Detroit Free Press entitled “Father's Day needs more real fathers.” He mentioned the large percentage of those “who are more sperm donors than fathers, shirking the consequences of careless unprotected sex, making parents out of those unwilling and sometimes unable to responsibly bring a child into the world.”

Mitch pointed out that most Father's Day columns “culminate in an appreciation of the man, something sweet he always did, something wise he always said, some love he always showed.” He warned that his was not one of those columns.

Were I to encourage you to read Mitch's column the way I did, I would urge you to think of another void which is becoming a new trend on Father's Day. It is not the numbers of children lacking a father on Father's Day, but a Father's Day in Detroit and surrounding areas where fathers mark that particular day with their children by calling, texting, skyping and emailing - sending love to distant places due to insufficient jobs and opportunities right here at home. My own personal experience was shared by many friends whose kids also live in distant places and were unable to “come home" for a Father's Day celebration.

Let me say that, as with most parents, our kids’ happiness is first and foremost. I can honestly state that each of our kids - Ari, Ashley and Milo in Chattanooga; Chad and girlfriend Whit in Eugene, Oregon; and Stephanie and boyfriend Zack in Olympia, Washington - each are at great places in their lives with successful careers and great relationships. Their choices for residency spoke volumes about what they saw as a lack of opportunity in their hometown. Each visit home is highlighted by the frustration that, while visiting mom and dad, there are few high school friends left to hang out with. Their friends also found little workplace opportunities in the community where they were raised.

I watch the exodus of those who leave the city. Because their kids don't live here, their choice of end of life decisions reflect the perception that Detroit is no longer considered home. I do not pretend to have a solution to this alarming situation, but I am deeply concerned for our community. Unless we can attract our kids with meaningful career possibilities here, we will lose more than great talent we spend so much love, time and energy developing.